Thursday, November 3, 2011

Son, You're Grown, Move out Your Mama's House

"Rob a store before you walk around poor....cause you aint getting nothin from me, you're grown booooy." --Lloyd Banks

See that shit quoted above? Yep. That's black logic. Can I say I whole heatedly disagree with it? Nope...absolutely not. I'm from the school of "man up and stand on your own two" as are most black men (baring the ones mooching off their overweight Caucasian lovers.) Hell, even the men allowing their mothers to put the house up for bail collateral, and those using their baby momma's income tax return to flip drug transactions are at least TRYING to stand on their own two.

When, then, should one deiced that he or she is pushing the age boundary for living at home? Its interesting that you ask, because there are 3 answers. The Caucasian answer, the African American Answer and the Nappyheaded Answer. (Im excluding latinos because yall just like living 100 deep in a house with abuela...its a cultural thing and makes for good parties y pernil.)

The Black Answer: Ni**a you're 18 its time you move out and stand on your own two.

The Nappyheaded Answer: If you're out of highschool and aren't home on college break, yet think its OK to be smashing hoes with reckless abandon at your mama's need a bachelor pad.

The White Answer: Stay here as long as it takes you to become a doctor...then double that time. Lol.

In deciding which option (all of which I've exaggerated for comedic purposes) makes the most sense, I shall quote my reckless blog brother from another mother:

"Theres a fine line between listening to what white people say and watching what they do , then tailoring it to fit our black experience." -Tako

Think about that for a minute...They key thing's blacks say is "man up, stand on your own 2 feet, work hard and provide your family with a better life than I gave you." This is a good philosophy, except that in order to do better than our parents we often need a boost... Back to Tako's statement.

African Americans are quick to say "If I had money like white people, I'd give my kids "X" amount of dollars to help them start a business, get out of debt and start a prosperous life." (Well, most blacks can't spell prosperous, but you know what i mean. KIDDING. Lol.) The problem with saying this is that we often can't do as "They" do, based on economic barriers. What we can do, however, is help them in any way we can. Allowing them to stay past 18 doesnt put any additional stress on the were already paying rent without him kicking in, and now, with him working full time you SHOULD be able to ease the financial burden a bit.

What this does for him is either a.) allows him to save for his own place without the whole "struggle to make ends meet" and desperately take the cheapest apartment and initiate the "live check to check, build up debt, fuck up my credit, repeat" cycle stuff or b.) allows him to stockpile foamposites, jordans and silver nameplate jewelry for his baby mama (in which case, give him the boot.)

Wja3: A Black power rant which praises white folk for their support network! It's gems like these which allow you to post recklessly and get away with calling girls hoes or telling fat girls to stop bringin Mcribs on the treadmill.

If you've ever noticed, as a GENERALIZATION, white kids tend to stay home longer while doing things like saving for a house, going to grad school and not taking out unnecessary student loans, entering residencies, etc. Rather than send their cubs into the wild unprepared, the white lioness nurtures all the while educating on the value of family as a support system, rather than a place to get bail money.

This being said, I'm not telling you what age to get out your mama's house, or what age to give your kids the boot. What I am saying is that arbitrarily picking a time is as pointless as fat people doing crunches. Nurture but dont coddle. Give your kids a fighting chance and ensure that they have goals, means and the tools to succeed...once these conditions are met you wont have to kick them out because you'll have raised responsible young mean ready to venture out into the real world on their own, thankful for all youve done.

Also: Tell em they can't get no pussy under your roof. That'll motivate em. LOL

In short: Don't act black, dont act white...act mixed. Swag.

-Mr Mulato

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