Tuesday, December 21, 2010

4 Loko Chronicles: The Finale. R.I.P.

Tako: Tell em' why you mad son!

Show: I ain't mad...

Tako: Yes you are

Show: I'm just saying...people casually read the blog, so why can't i casually write. Like whenever I'm not working or gettin pu**y or whatever....

Wja3: Settle down boys. We're back on the air, live in 3....2....1....

I'm not quite sure what it is about going out of town that makes ones inhibitions and general sense of common decency fly out the window quicker than a married man in a 1st floor apartment's mistress when wifey comes home. Something about the allure of being in an unfamiliar setting, albiet 10 minutes from home, where no one knows you and you don't know them. That's right, this is not Cheers ni**a.

Everyone does not know your name...but they will remember your story, well...at least they'll remember ours.

So, it begins like it always does...four locos and 4 Loko. Unfortunately for Lefleur, the individual tasked with driving me, D-white and Dingo, he was unable to partake in the festivities until we reached our final destination, thereby forcing him to have to play "catch up." Bad idea.

Tako: You're drunk yada yada...I'm Show I like to make myself seem grandiose...I meat hop my own personal style and drinking ability....I run marathons and take pics with my shirt off....GET TO THE FUCKIN POINT Mop-head!!!!

C4: Dead.

Anyways.....after we get to Buc Dinero's crib in beantown and take a long train ride downtown we "begins to get it poppin" [sic]. A few rounds of brew, of which Buc Dinero somehow managed to not buy one round, and a few bar hops later we end up at the pour house...no pun intended.

Highlights include me and a white dude breakdance battling, a puertorican dude throwing up blood signs and soo-woo'ing in a room full of white people and me and D-white having a "Cat daddy" dance off.

The Cat daddy: Act like you're in a wheelchair racing. Pop a wheelie for style.

As we are leaving, we take some farewell shots.....Lefleur is no good ant taking shots.


Girl (Not seeing what happened behind her): Ugggh. I think your friend spilled water on me.

D-White: That...ummmm....That wasn't water (Bruh man from the 5th flo' voice).

Yes boys and girls, Lefleur threw up on the only black chick in the bar and escaped before she realized what happened. That wasn't even the hilight of the night... because we went to another bar next.

After we finally get to the "hood bar" Lefleur and Show start dancing with a black girl and a fat puertorican. Ill let you figure out who did what. This, however, is irrelevant as Dingo stole the spotlight on this twilight night.

Dingo (With his right hand holding his wallet): Did this chick grab my butt.

Pats butt (pause) with left hand feeling for wallet.

Dingo: Where's my wallet. This hoe got me. Oh hell no.

Mind you, his wallet is still in his right hand. He is drunk and oblivious to this.

Dingo: I felt that hoe. Give me my wallet.

Grabs her by the arm and gives her a little shake and pat down by the pocket of what appears to be a hoodie dress. In his defense it did look like she couldve been hiding something, but damn, son had her yoked up. LOL.

Dingo: Won't be no problems, just give me the wallet and go about your business.

Looks and sees wallet in his hand, forcing him to release his Kung-Fu Ninja Grib on the girl.

Dingo: I'm so sorry, I just....um....I mean....let me buy you a drink? My bad.

LMAO and D.E.A.D

R.I.P 4 Loko

Guess I'll have to make do with these....


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