Wednesday, July 7, 2010

Sex Cows (Trey Songz Voice)

Show: I got some news to post.

C4: Like real news or Blog news?

Show: What's the difference?

Live from the World Wide Web.....Sex Cows (Trey Songz Voice)

Teenager Passes Out Marrying Cow He Had Sex With

A Balinese teenager caught in the act of intercourse with a cow passed out on Friday when he was forced to marry the animal in a ceremony witnessed by hundreds of curious onlookers.

As the Jakarta Globe reported earlier in the day, Ngurah Alit, 18, an unemployed youth from the seaside village of Yeh Embang in Jembrana, was caught stark naked positioned behind the cow in a rice paddy field.

Tako: would that still be considered doggystyle?

Show: Talkin bout Snoop, Talkin bout some Snoop...(Dramatics voice)

In his defence, Alit admitted to the act of bestiality but claimed the cow, which he believed was a young and beautiful woman, had wooed him with flattering compliments.

WJA3: Oh this is some bullshit!!!

Show: Its like old boy on howard stern who was sleeping with the Dolphins. Did you know they have Vaginas? Showrock knowledge tidbit of the day.

C4: Well cows that is maaaaaaad Gay. Also gross.

Show: Would you rather do a Female dolphin or a guy?

C4, Wja3 & Tako: Dolphin!!

Show: Dolphin or Cow?

Tako: Brad Pitt or your mom?

WJA3: LMAO. What's wrong with you all?!!!

As part of a Pecaruan ritual, a ceremony to cleanse the village of the unholy act of a man mating with a cow, Alit was forced to “marry” the animal.

Alit, however, according to, passed out surrounded by locals and police, who were attempting to prevent a number of journalists from covering the spectacle.

It is unclear whether or not he got to say “I do.”

Alit’s collapse prompted his mother to begin screaming hysterically, while other family members shouted at photographers not to take pictures.

C4: Lemme get this straight...she's trippin cause he fainted but not cause her son was boning a heifer...excuse me...a cow. LOL. (P.S. I dont mean like a "showrocka likes fat girls actual cow.)

Poor kid. He’s actually a quiet kid,” said one villager.

As part of the ceremony, Alit’s victim and new bride was drowned in ocean.

Alit, on the other hand, was symbolically drowned and bathed on the beach.

“Only his clothes were thrown into the sea,” the villager said.

Village chief Ida Bagus Legawa declared that the village had been “cleansed” from the “defilement from the incident.”

So let "Us" get this clear...(Bros collective voice). The man in question basically rapes a cow and as punishment, the Cow has to be drowned. Hmmmmmm. I see a slippery slope for special victims cases, but something which at least has a method to its madness. Kill the victim rather than force it to endure a lifetime of mental instability and pain at the cause of its captor? Hmmmm. Still dont think I could condone that. Maybe killing the attacker, but in actuality, the damage has already been done.

They should've made the punishment fit the crime.

Put him in a concentration camp, forced to milk cows all day. Ummmm second thought, that'd be like making R-Kelly and Pleasure P pre-school teachers. How bout Chinese water torture with milk...or how about this. Send him to jail and let guys butt fu*k him by force? no "bull"-shit. LOL. I bet he'll fight it, but in the end, those jailhouse pervs will get the "moo"-shu one way or the other. LMAO. Hahahaha.

--Show-Sho & the Bros


Akira said...

why is there a ritual for cleansing the village after someone mates with a cow? how widespread is this?

Rock said...

I dont know about you Akira, but if somebody does it with a cow in my room I want the entire bitch cleansed!!!!!!!

Probably smell like Double quarter Pounders and skeet.

I dont want somebody snap, crackle and popping off in the animal which delivers my morning cereal accoutremant.

Akira said...


Abhi said...

sex cows. have sex with cows!

Anonymous said...

is this how chitlins get their distinctive taste? LOL

Rock said...

Its "Chitterlings" and they are pork. Now decent colored man would skeet in the oh so tasty swine specimen.