Wednesday, March 3, 2010

Why It's Best to Remain Calm When Someone's Steps on Your New J's

C4's blog entry about the old white dude beating up the slightly younger black dude inspired to write a quick entry about how as grown men, it's probably best to avoid physical confrontations if at all possible.



In fact, the only good reasons to fight these days is defending the honor of your mother/sister/significant other or having your boy's back. Those are the only acceptable reasons to fight. If you fight for anything other than those reasons, you're probably a dumb-ass and deserve the ass-whipping you're about to take.





There are 3 major reasons to not get into a physical confrontation in 2010:


1) No one fights a fair one

2) the Anderson Silva factor, and


3) Bouncers/Police will Whip Your Ass if You Win




WJA3's #1 Reason to Remain Calm when a N-Word bumps into You in the Club - No One Fights a Fair One



I think the last recorded fair street fight was with Mike Tyson broke Mitch Green's nose in 1988. Ever since then, there hasn't been a fair street fight. Everybody has people waiting on deck for outside interference or even worse, are equipped with weapons of mass destruction.



Even the cleanest living person keeps their crazy family member (usually a cousin who just got out of jail) who has the mentality of the dude from the old Ma$e skit ("I'm Not Scared And...I Want!...to Go Back!") on speed dial.

One wouldn't expect it knowing my personality, but WJA2 has more guns than TI for anybody who steps to the fam.



WJA3's #2 Reason to Just Take It as a Compliment if a Dude stares at Your Girl Too Long - The Anderson Silva Factor







For those who aren't familar with UFC, the gentleman who looks like a herb despite the mildly amusing t-shirt is Anderson Silva. His voice gives you the impression his nuts haven't dropped yet PAUSE.




His physique is at best of someone who jogs 2-3 times a week. His appearance is not at all intimidating. He also has black belts in Tae Kwon Do, Judo, & Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu. And as you can see from the video below, he's currently the baddest man on the planet.













There are thousands of people out there, who like Silva, don't look like ish but can probably kill you in 7 different ways. The days of Debo looking n-words being the tough guys are long gone.



WJA3's #3 Reason to Just Chill if Someone Spills a Little Bit of Their Drink on Your Polo - Even if You Win, You Lose





Ever seen a fight break out in a bar or club and the winner gets escorted out by bouncers. He isn't being taken to a VIP section, this is most likely what is occurring:












If not bouncers, the police are also willing to escort you to the "winner's circle" located by the docks.



End of the day, just say no to violence....unless someone slaps your girl's ass or calls your momma a ho. In that case, do what you gotta do.



--WJA3 the Bl-O.G.



5 comments:

Carl said...

Another gem of wisdom that ignorant n-words will ignore in favor of "keepin it real."

I love that your pops has more guns than T.I. too, LOL.

MW said...

I love that the only three reasons listed are those that warn you of potential ramifications of getting into physical confrontations, not appeals to "be the better man" or not get in fights because it's "r-worded" (gotta be Palinesquefully PC sometimes?).

But they are indeed in the correct order. No amount of South American-flavored kiaiing is going to stop a well-placed bullet from sending a would-be Anderson Silva to that Great Octagon in the Sky.

Rock said...

I'm saying tho...When will we as a people learn that like a war, a fight has no true winner...just 1.) the nigga who got his ass kicked, who is consequently also # 2.) the dude who has to watch his back for the rest of his life.

This is why when I get rich I'ma walk around with my own group of peaceful chicknheads. Loud, Abnoxious, Bamboo earring wearing Broads yealling and screaming about Non-violence in Martin Luther King Booty Shorts.

Either that or I'll roll with some ass kickin japanese ninjas. Nobody fucks with Ninjas.

Elliott said...

I think you forgot to mention that a lot of these incidents are in large part due to "egos" and "alcohol", cornerstones of the black gathering experience. Simply saying we should remain calm when your J's get trounced on is not enough, I think location and inebriation level both play important factors that are taken into account (or neglected) before an altercation ensues.

Cie Breezy said...

i'm a hella late commentator.. however, you step on my J's.. you gotta die. point blank.

i have renounced my niggahdom a long while ago.. however, i work hard to pay for my j's.. don't step on them.

actually, you may accidentally step on them, however don't look at me like i was wrong. apologize and i may reconsider taking out my switchblade and cutting you... BADLY.
...cuz baby i'ma thug (trick daddy voice) LOL