Thursday, March 4, 2010

The Most American Idol: Because most Americans are Overweight

Tako "Blogzilla" Tsou: So Can I finally post a Blog now?

C4 the Blogface Killah: Nope. Still in Training.

Blogzilla: Come on man, you know I spit hot Dylon Fiyah.

C4: Need an OK from the Boss.

Blogzilla: You are the Boss!!!!!

C4: Needs to be unanimous...and since Show-Sho's still nowhere to be found, you have to wait. Nigga aint answering my calls, and if it werent for the occasional Blog comment, I'd think he's dead.

Blogzilla: He sent me an email. Well, I mean, he emailed me a video. Can I post that?

C4: I can't see why not. But easy on the commentary, you're new around here Daniel-son.

Blogzilla: The karate Kid wasn't even Japanese you racist fuck. Anyways, I got the following video from Show-sho with the following caption:

"Free prize of some sort (no homo) to anyone who can watch this all the way through. " -S.

C4: What a strange man.

Oh so true.

C4: I almost feel bad for that chick. Not bad enough to stop laughing and cover my ears. Her face is morally offensive.

It like someone inbred two cousins and a Pug dog, smashed the baby's face with a cinder block and then fed it nothing but bacon and vinegar all its life.

: LMAO!!! This makes all fat people look bad, undoubtedly what show was going for despite his penchant for overly thick girls.

I never got that about him. Its like theres some funny math equation where white or paprikan negates the existence of around 3o-50 pounds, yet dark skin adds pounds in exponential magnitude.

C4: Except the black girls he does like either look pepperican (not paprikan, you rookie), which makes sense, or are dark skinned because they remind his vain ass of himself. LOL.

This video though, ughhhh. Where'd he find this land beast.

She looks like the dog from the never ending story....and God I hope this story ends. They should make her sterile. And no, I don't have to play nice. You put it on youtube, you do it to yourself.

Word. I couldn't watch it all the way through.

Me either. Show-sho wins. Clever, emotionally unstable muthfucka.

--The Bros ( + 1 and - 2)


MW said...

Vile. Somehow the image that came to mind when I saw her caterwauling was the very same nightmarish Inseminoid creature from the depths of Eric Cartman's psyche, as seen at the 1:00-1:01 mark in this short South Park clip. And please don't ruin my childhood by comparing this warbling hellbeast to the lovable luck dragon Falcor.

Also: no, I did not make it through this shitshow. I took a peep, but that's as much as anyone should do!

P.S. Neither "Daniel-san" nor Mister Miyagi were really that Japanese. And surely Jackie Chan is not going to teach Will Smith's nappyheaded spawn anything close to a Japanese martial art in the upcoming pointless fucking remake.

Happy Goddamn Friday!

Rock said...

I Knew you Bitches couln't watch the whole thing!


Akira said...

MW: Will Smith's kid has good hair. Take back that nappyheaded remark!

Interesting post today guys. I didnt watch the video, but that still, coupled with the title was enough to turn me off. Enjoy the weekend.

MW said...

OK. He may not be "nappyheaded" in the literal sense, but he's surely a Hollywood ho-in-the-making, since we can surely at least agree that he's in this film only on borrowed star power from his daddy. A star power that's been plummeting from the heavens ever since aliens got "welcome[d] to earf [sic]!" on July 4th.

P.S. ever see that "Twilight Zone" when all the beautiful people were ugly pigfaces and the freaks were normal human beings? Well, this girl surely escaped from that "fifth dimension, beyond that which is known to man".

Lastly, we all know that she would never sing this "farewell" song to any boy. Isn't that the real tragedy here? Read the lyrics and try to apply them to her life. Go on. You'll feel awful about everything.

Akira said...

Agreed on borrowed star power.

Had not seen that Twilight Zone episode, but thanks for the wiki links. Is there a term for when you get lost in wikipedia, hitting link after link based on one obscure look up? Because I just spent an entire meeting doing that. Wikitangents, I call them in my head.

Carl said...

Alright you sick bastard, I made it through the whole 3:56. I started going into diabetic shock around 2:49, but I'm glad I toughed it out cuz there are particularly funny moments around the 3:28 mark.

That being said, I better get a good f***ing prize.

Amir said...

paprikan = native american??

Carl said...

LMAO! @ Amir, and I think you're right on with that one.