Friday, December 11, 2009

You Can't Perfume a Pig...But You can Louie Vuitton It!!!!

Sometimes I'm clever, sometimes I'm hilarious, and other times I just whip my meat out on the computer and see if I can make it type by plucking my balls as hard as I can.

Today's one of those days where I'll do none of these things> I'm just gonna bring you some nonsencical news about Louis Vuitton pigs. Mami I want one...and I want it now (Bianca from Willy Wonka Voice).

Oww Owww. I mean, Oink Oinkkkkkkkk. Gimmie that Bacon !! (Plies voice).

September 4th, 2008: The Shanghaiist

This pair of pigs tattooed with Louis Vuitton logos will be on exhibition Monday at the Shanghai Contemporary Art Fair together with eight other tattooed pigs.

They're the unconventional works of Belgian conceptual artist Wim Delvoye who just sold a tattoo on the back of a Swiss man which depicts the Virgin Mary with a lifeless skull (click for image) for a record €150,000. The extraordinary transaction allows for the 35-hour work to be removed from the bearer's skin upon death and handed over to the buyer. The tattoo will also be on exhibition in Shanghai — attached to the man we assume.

Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat? Let me rephrase that. What the F**k is wrong with these Orientals?? Oh, I can't say that? Fine. What is wrong with these Asians. It's not like I said chink. Sheeesh (Juelz Santana Voice.)

I swear if these Chiggas weren't so good at making pork fried rice or hooking shit up with the inafmous "saltpeppaketchup", I wouldn't know what to do with them. Kidding. This is actually the japanese anyway...and I love karate and sushi. LOL.

The point of the matter is this....this shit right here my coon, is unacceptible!!! Tattooing pigs.

C4: Look my nigga. The article clearly says the artist is Belgian, and Shanghi is not in Japan. Coon. Stop being racist.

Show: I ain't racist. I love Sailor moon.

C4: Anyways.....

So my partner and crime "Caveman" and I were definitely having a conversation last week about this exact type of tomfoolery. Tattooing animals. That's right, Showrock the avid Mike Vick supporter (Go E-A-G-L-E-S!!) was against this type of cruelty while my primal (no homo) neandrethal homie was all for tattoing a shaved cat with gucci print just to be "baller" or "pimp." Just when I thought our nonsensical conversation had been eclipsed by the apparent illegality of it all, I run into this shit!!!!

Leave it up to the baby eating Asians. (See last weeks post for details on cannibalism.)

Also, Caveman...

The pigs were banned from the art show. Had they been alive, the artist would be in jail listening to Gucci Mane and lil weezy taking turns screaming from anal rape. Yaaaaahhhhh (Gucci Voice.)

Live, Love, Swine!!!!



khaki said...

tatting pigs? Ok.

MW said...

I think you've glossed over a pretty overt message that the artist probably was trying to make: namely, the often perplexingly porcine hunger for brand goods and the exhibitionistic need to adorn oneself with their logos proudly (that's not a j'accuse!, Showrocka).

And let me tell you: I've seen plenty of fat women in Asia, Europe, and the U.S. proudly toting their L.V. purses that probably cost them a week's salary.


Pigs do get an unfair rep as being insatiable gluttons and flu-bearing disease-bags, but there's no need to torture them for art's sake. It's bad enough that they are considered vile livestock and inedible by Jews, Muslims, and those fake Muslims in the States who put on a ghost costume, claim to love Allah, and then do nothing else to live better lives.


Lastly, if my double-baconated septuple Whopper® has a Louis Vuitton logo somewhere in those crispy, fat-laden hog strips, I will puke. And then I will go shopping at Prada with Burger King sick on my breath.

Rock said...

I think it would've made a better statement if it said "Eat more chicken" or "Fre Mike Vick" instead of the logos, but point well taken mr. wizard.

Anonymous said...

Listen, this what happens when an idea is poorly executed. I've been talkiing about this for at least a year. But it must be done on rotwiellers or pittbulls, with the logos completely covering the dog... Furthermore, these dogs are. To be attached to a lowrider-esq cart (think Alaskan dog sled) with daytons and woofers.... That my friends is the complete concept... The ghetto chariot! Now that shit would make money...a pimp chasing down his hoes with a pack of louis vitton pitt bulls craving blood.... Leave it to the belgasians to fuck up another one of my genious ideas...

-Kman the Caveman