Wednesday, November 25, 2009

Baby Mama's are like Playstations (PART 2!!!!!)


For anyone who hasn't read "Baby Mama's are like playstations", one of my first blog posts, please read it here. I was funny back then, but I'm much more of an insightful asshole now. Actually, I'll let you be the judge.




I could easily make a case that baby mama's are like any video game console...fun and interesting to play with at first, but eventually something with which you quickly lose interest. This, however, would be too easy and simplified an explanation as in reality, the baby mama-playstaion theory is much more precise and complex.

Think about it. Other than playstations, no gaming options exist other than Xbox (Wives) and Nintendo DS's (Girlfriends.) Let me explain.

XBOX

You see, people with Xbox's represent the impatient segment of the population (those who couldn't wait for back ordered Playstations or who thought that their girl was so perfect, they would never do any better. Neither of these options are bad in and of themselves, they simply represent a different type of gamer than the Playstation Playboy. Xbox aficionados are also known for their characteristic trait of playing Halo.


That's it. No one buys Xbox for any other game. This being said, xbox coveters tend to play online and stay inside the home (i.e. marriage) engaging in their own halo world and only going out with fellow Xbox-ers (I.e. married couples dates.)


Frickin Dorks. They're almost as Corny as Sneakerheads.




Nintendo DS




A perfected version of a Gameboy (or the latest incarnation in a progression of 'fun girls'), the DS is everything your Playstation or Xbox is not. It's portable (you can take her anywhere in public), cheap (relatively) and good for taking trips.


See you're never too hot for cheap food.LOL

Would you want to sit at home and play it night after night? Fu*k no. She'll obviously get fat eating all that Mcdonalds, and plus, that's what you have a Playstation or Xbox for silly.

Playstations...(Insert ominous music)

Now for the big guns. Playstations. In the beginning these consoles (or baby mamas) were represented by Gray (or a mixture of white and black) until the marketers at Sony said "c'mon, lets stop kidding ourselves.Lets just make it black, for obvious reasons. " lol. Nintendo Wii's however are still white. Why wouldn't they be? they're slim, promote fitness and aren't associated with niggas playing Madden.




White people, as you will notice, tend to be more educated on the pros and cons of each system and often have both a Playsation and Xbox (imagine that...a baby by your wife!! LOL).

Think about it. Have you ver seen a discarded playstation? Nope. In the same way that someones baby mama never truly "goes away", old playstations tend to stick around even after you've aquired your first Xbox. The same cannot be said for those who purchased an Xbox first. Smh. This being said, I now bring you to the revelation embedded in this insightful post. I think I really like playing Xbox (I haven't bought it yet), but I wish I would've gotten a playstation first. True story!!!

Not that I'm looking forward to having to buy two sets of games or making sure each console is properly maintained (that could get expensive), but I just dont want to fel like I'm missing out on a two for one deal! Think about it...even if you only played playstation once a month, you would still choose the package deal of "XBOX + Playstation" vs. "XBOX or Playstation" if they were the same price.

This being said I'm trying to use my Ivy League education to find a solution and possibly broker a deal. If i Pawn my Xbox and use the money to get a playstation, I still have at least 15 days to get the money together and re-claim it. Hmmmm. Problem with this is, I'm not so sure I want to risk th chance of not getting it back or having a bunch of nappyheaded hooligans putting their hands all over it. Guess I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. Pause, no homo. Kinda makes you miss the days where shit was simple...

Fuck this, I'm gonna go dust off my 1 player Sega and go play by myself. LOL.


Live, Love, Games

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