Monday, August 3, 2009

I love you but I wish I could Quit you (Pt. 2): The N-Word.


That's what I say when I know that my duties as the self proclaimed Mr. "keep it 100" are about to clash with the idea of generally acceptable speech or standards of common decency. Fuck it...(side note, that's the first time I haven't bleeped out the word fuck. It's going to be a reckless day.)

In the same way that it would be irresponsible and downright criminal to scream "Fire!" in a crowded movie theatre (or around a black suspect and white cops), I know that I probably shouldn't say the words which are effortlessly and recklessly rolling of the tip of my tongue (no homo.) Old people... no one gives a fuck that you are offended by the N word because of its negative connotations and the brutal and all too recent history of slavery. Boo hoo hoo.
We weren't alive for that shit and neither were you, so get over it. Sure, slavery was extremely fucked up. Our ancestors were viciously raped, beaten and subjected to inhuman torture, as savvy white people proceeded to establish the longstanding institutions and practices which still haunt us to this day. This is fact.
However, I ask you all one simple question. What the fuck does this have to do with me saying "what's good nigga?" to a lifelong acquaintance subject to the same history of subtle racism as myself. Again...a message to the older, N-word hating generation. Stop your bitching. Why would we take advice from people who cant even work computers.

Oh boy...I can hear the African Studies Majors and Che-Guevarra supporting white people getting their disgruntled Victoria's secret panties in a bunch as we speak. Young adults and middle aged people also in favor of this "Abolish the N-word movement", don't think I've forgotten about you. You guys can also take your Afrocentric head wraps and stick em' where the sun don't shine. Don't you know that this is America, home of Freedom of Speech and the No Bitch Assness movement. Though the roots of the N word can be traced to slavery and the Jim crow area, so can soul food. I don't see y'all fat, nappyheaded, Big Momma's house looking hoes giving that up!

Should the N word be eliminated? Hell fucking yeah....but not for the reason you whitewashed uncle Toms and Old Cicily Tyson looking hoes think it should. The N word should be abolished because she (the N-word ,that is) is cheating on us! Yes, that right. The N-word is cheating on us with white people who misuse and abuse her, possessive Puertoricans who think they own her, and Non-descript, non-nigga niggas like DJ Khaled who are not good enough for her and quite frankly just look foolish next to our beloved baby boo.

This being said...

I love you but I wish I could Quit you ... Nigga. (no Homo).

Despite the fact that I have been to college for X amount of years and have X amount of degrees, I cannot help but associate myself with the things around which I was raised. While some call it "keeping it real", my penchant for quarter-waters (basehead juices if you're from New Haven), pork rinds and the N-word all stem from life the life experiences during my formative years which have made me the man I am today. Without quarter-waters and the N-word, there would be no well versed Ivy man who is the first in his family to attend a four years university. There would be no tattooed Thoreau recklessly chronicling a myriad of hood sh*t through the eyes of an accomplished scholar. Most importantly, however...there would be no Nappy headed Bros...Ni**a.

Why then, would I want to quit something so essential to my own being and with which I have some many fond memories? Because, ni**a. I don't care who you are or where you are from, there s no way to make the word ni**a sound professional, eloquent or acceptable in the office place or professional world. In the same way that you aren't going to bring your 1st baby momma ( you know, the one with the blond extensions...) to a company golf outing, Ms. N-word is a little too rough around the edges and uncouth to bring into certain situations. Funny thing is, we like her like that. This being said, for the sake of saving her the embarrassment of being overly commercialized and exploited by the same white people who've taken hold of Hiphop, the words 'Crunk' and 'Skeet' (sorry black people, we bastardized 'Swagger' on our own), I am trying my best to give up this guilty pleasure just like I've done to my beloved bbw movies. Tear.

Even worse than this seemingly avoidable yet all t0o predictable end result of the word nigga becoming commonplace or acceptable speech in all circles of life, I am ready to give her up mainly because the bi**h has already started stepping out. Once Fat Joe decided that Puertoricans were black enough to be using the term, everyone and their alabaster toned mother started taking poetic licence to use the term.

Here's the dilemma. How can one determine, based on complexion or genetic make-up, who can use a particular word, especially when the claim is that this "N-Word" is not the same thing as the word "Nigger" from the antebellum south? You see black people, we've talked ourselves into a corner and are now essentially fuc*ed. Had we kept it 100 and said, "yep, its pretty much the same word, but now we've Deebo-ed it (took it by force), and I dare any of yall bi*ch ass ni**as to try to take it back" we would've been alright. We didn't, however, so we are now faced with an ultimatum. Share her or set her free and as Maxwell would say, let her spread her pretty wings.

Side Note: If it were up to Showrock, she'd be spreading her pretty little something elses, but I guess that's why I'm not an R & B singer...Yet. In the end, the N-word is just like any woman in that if you truly love her, you have to let her go...I, for one, do not believe in Handcuffing and have no interest in sharing.

This being said, I have to let you go Nigga. (No Homo).

Live, Love,

Writing an entire post about not using a word that I'll probably be using by the end of the day


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