Friday, July 10, 2009

Sexy Ass Non-Female Rappers (No Homo)

Lil Kim. Foxy Brown. Trina. Eve. Remy Ma. Queen Latifah. Mia-X. That Girl Mysterious from making the band...Nah, I'm just f**king with yall. This post isn't about females at all...it's about these sexy ass male rappers. Pause, no homo. Let a ni**a explain fam...


A few years ago, around the same time that groups like D4L had the streets abuzz with the newly christened 'ringtone rap', Atlanta and other southern states all but dominated radio and television airwaves. Soljah Boy Tell'em and Yung Joc had the whole world doing their respective dances, as Nas and the entire east coast hip-hop collective had officially proclaimed Hip Hop to be dead. With the Notorious B.I.G dead, Old ass Jay-Z in pseudo retirement and Cam'ron's Dipset left to hold NY down, Nas was f**king right. Hip Hop wasn't dying b...that sh*t was dead. Wanna know why? Because New York rappers started trying to be too f**king sexy. No homo.


While I do not typically blog about hip hop and my love for it, based on the general viewership of the blog listening to a variety of different musical genres, I could not help but blog about these homophobic homo rappers who killed hip hop and allowed these no talent southern bamas the chance to overtake the airwaves substituting swagger for substance. Phew. That was a run on sentence like a mutha fu**a...it's OK though, i compensated for it with a few fragments. Beeeyatch.


This being said, I am going to cut to the f**king chase. Since the days of NWA and the ganstafied 1990's, hard core rap has reigned supreme from coast to coast.


Sure there have always been so called sexy rappers, catering to ladies (i.e. LL Cool J), but we aren't talking about him.




What I am talking about is these sexy ass gangsta rappers. Side note: R and B singers, ironically, are becoming as thugged out as ever. Go figure.



As a result of this paradigm shift, the American populous has decided to all but give up on traditional east coast rap. Remembering the old days when groups like the Wu, Mobb Deep, Naughty by Nature and even rappers like Shyne-Po filled our ears with musical drive-bys, many die-hard fans turned to the underground scene as a means of preserving their eardrums as well as their love for hip hop.


As for the rest of us...well, the rest of us (regretfully) turned to southern Hip Hop, not because of the infectious drone of their bass knockin beats, or their not-so clever wordplay (which barely f**king rhymed) but simply because they were KEEPING IT GANGSTA!!



Side note: Yes I know Plies cannot keep his shirt on but I also believe he's trying to be more gangsta than sexy. The man has an iced out ski mask for a pendant.


Anyways....I digress...Toting guns and rocking gaudy diamond chains is where it's at son! Mainly because all we 'legitimate' people who've gone to school for 5+ years and do not make half as much money don't believe you should be spending what is basically free money (there's no way they should be making what they do) on legitimate shit. Blow it just like drug money and keep everyone happy!

I know it may sound a bit ignorant, but this is rap we're talking about...not Neo-Soul. Southern rappers seemed to intuitively understand this concept dwelling within the subconscious of their fans, meanwhile East coast rappers were off getting sexyy with themselves...literally

Don't blame it on age and maturity either. If that's the case, go get a real job and leave rap to the young'ns...


And who could forget Mr. 'Ay' , I rhyme the same word with itself 10 times per song.



Yeah...remember when Dip Set used to look like this...



And now for Chuck-E-Cheese...I'm Sorry, I mean T.I...All rats look alike...LOL

This f**king guy....What kind of asshole is off buying assault weapons in real life and still trying to be sexy for the camera!! (I know he's from the south but I couldn't resist..plus look at all the guns he got caught with! Poser.)



How could I forget two of my my favorite rap groups of all time (Naughty by Nature and Onyx)who have fallen victim to the pitfall of trying to be sexy. How the F**k did we go from this.....




To this....

Or from this....

To this!!!!!!!!!!!

What the f**k happened to the chainsaw...the machete...the beat down bat? I know East Orange New Jersey is harder than that son!


Tupac and the real gangsta rappers of the 1990's are turning over in their graves right now. Having a different style is one thing, but trend humping and riding a wave of inherent sexy gayness is something else. No more 'Right Said Fred' rappers who are too sexy for their shirt. We will not stand for it. Remember this day, as this blog is from yours truly, Show muthafu**in Rocka.

And this...
The proverbial 'F**k you" to all sexy rappers, is for Pac .

Live, Love, Gangsta


Show

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

okay...so I am so ole school it is a shame ... but I gotta agree ... I am having some serious problem with rap and rappers...they are confused which confuses me probably because they cannot figure out if they want to rap or sing. And dang their singing is well sound so bad it is is a turn off. I am not mad at those who when they mature their life style changes [Jay-Z, LL], but some of these newbeeeeeees are selling out to mainstream before they even pay their dues. I could go on but ... well I am such a terrible writer I better stop while I am ahead.

Anonymous said...

Even skinny jeans, in my opinion, are better than this new age sexy shit. A sexy thug? Come on. Sexy is the anthesis of thug.